How many times have you said that?  Did you say it the first day of a new diet?  Or the first day of a new exercise regimen?  Or the first day of a school year?  Or after a fight with your spouse?  Or whatever the occasion you can think of that would suit the phrase.  Have you said it recently?  I have not though I got to thinking about it yesterday.

I got some news that a dear friend/relative is dealing with cardiac issues.  Then, and this is the silly part, I was watching my soap – yes I still watch one soap – and a main character is dying.  The two items just sort of had me sitting there and thinking.  Both people are very aware of their situations one is real and one is not.  Blessedly the real situation is in good hands. All that can be done is being done. There will be a good healthy outcome and many more years of living. 

The soap lady will be gone – she must be retiring – and is being finally written off the show.  Better to be written off than and accident I understand.  Years ago the death knell for a character was an accident.  The actors often comment that if they have an accident they know they are being fired.  There are very few daytime soaps left.  I do not even watch it in the right timeslot now that I can DVR it.  I usually watch it after my lunch before my afternoon schedule kicks in.  Yesterday it was ironing.

The writers for the soap character really had a field day with the situation.  Before it ended the character, Stephanie, had the opportunity to give a soliloquy about how her world seems now that she knows she has a limited amount of time to live. Part of what she says is that she knows we all know we are going to die.  Knowing that she has a date certain is making everything so very different.  There is nothing like the poetry of soap writers as she went on to describe the beauty of her family and life!  The husband is going to throw her a party to celebrate her life while she is still here!  Thought that a fun idea!

So the meditation part for me was to think about my life and my surroundings and am I living it to the best I can?  Would I change anything?  Am I as healthy as I want to be?  What can I change?  Do I want to change anything?  Do those I care about know just how much I care?  Have I told them lately that I love them?  If not why not and can I do better?  As you can see it was an interesting next few minutes. 

The words and question still linger.  Have I done the best I can do in my life?  What about going forward?  What about you?  Years ago a priest gave a homily about a review he did of his day each night before sleeping.  He used an acronym which I cannot remember.  The review each night still sounds like a good idea.  Am thinking if I would do it regularly perhaps it would allow me to sleep better?

In the mid 70’s I was clipping sayings from magazines and posting them around as inspiration.  The one that has stayed with me and moved to sit on every kitchen sink sill or shelf says much the same thing as the sentiment with which I began.  I placed the clipping in 2X3 gold frame.  Over the 35+ years it yellowed and stained.  Last year, to make it easier to read, I retyped it and place it back in the frame.  I try to read it daily.  I try to live it daily.  Try is the operative word here.   It excuses a messy house and bulging ironing pile.  It reads:

“If I had 24 hours for living,

The things that don’t matter could wait.

I’d play with the children and

hear all the stories,

I’d tell you I love you before it’s too late.”

Today is the first day of the rest of my life.  I love you all – even the sweet person who called me a narrow-minded racist bigot and the friend I asked to leave my home.  There is a difference between who you are and the behavior you exhibited.  All are important to me – those I know and those I have yet to meet.  Today it is not too late for me.  It is the first day of the next 62+ years (I am going to live to 124) and I am going to make the most of it!!!

Your turn…….


By ktsquared Posted in Trivia


  1. Funny thing about dying, each day it gets a little bit closer, but when is it? Since I am about to turn 65, I find the question, Are we there yet? keeps popping into my mind each time I have an odd feeling, and let me say, odd feelings are a daily occurrence when you get this old. Wow, that’s a sentence and a SENTENCE!

    Are we there yet? Do you ever remember saying that as a kid? It usually preceded a swat to the back seat by one or more parents. By the way, any kid with experience could easily avoid car swats, but they did communicate a distinct message from your parents. I remember my kids saying it, but Diane had installed a no-swatting rule for our everyday living with our kids whether we were in the car or anywhere. So they may not understand or communicate that way to their children, someday if there ever are any.

    Having entered retirement a few years ago, I felt compelled to calculate our annual cash flow to assure us we had enough to retire on. It was easy for me because I had done cash flows on capital expenditures for years in business. I always had to prove to management that changes made economic sense. When I did it the first time in 2000, we did not have enough, but it showed me how much we needed. Over the next 7 years we accumulated enough and more, so I retired early, at 59 and 9 months. My dad had retired at 59 and 11 months, so I was about on his pace. Each year I refined the cash flow analysis more and more as new information came in regarding things like regular health insurance, Medicare, car and home insurances, taxes, etc. Recently I announced to Diane that we could live to 143. She doubted my conclusion. I think I understand why. Right afterward I told my financial advisor to up my projection for death from 73 to 76. He smiled and said okay. It turns out I am one of the few, if only, client he has who regularly predicts his death for financial reasons. I plan to stick it out as long as I can, except if I reach my limit of 143. Of course that number is highly dependent upon whether or not we have to buy a new car or want steak tonight instead of chicken. Some people concern themselves with cholesterol when eating steak. I guess they do not know how to calculate long-term financial exhaustion.

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